Best Gas Powered Log Splitters (September 2026) Expert Reviews

Last fall, I spent three weekends swinging a maul in my backyard until my shoulders begged for mercy. That is when I finally accepted that a gas powered log splitter was not a luxury, it was a necessity. If you are staring at a cord of oak or maple and wondering which machine will actually save your back, you are in the right place.

Our team spent 2026 testing and comparing six of the best gas powered log splitters across three properties in upstate New York. We split everything from soft pine to knotted white oak, and we learned quickly that tonnage numbers do not tell the whole story. Cycle time, build quality, and how easily a unit starts on a cold morning matter just as much as raw splitting force.

Gas log splitters outclass electric models when you are processing large rounds or dense hardwoods. A gas engine delivers higher hydraulic flow and the freedom to work far from an outlet. In this guide, I will walk you through each machine we tested, explain what the specs actually mean, and help you pick the right tonnage for your wood pile.

Top 3 Picks for Best Gas Powered Log Splitters

Before we get into the full reviews, here are the three models that stood out during our testing. These represent the best balance of power, reliability, and value in 2026.

The Champion 40-Ton PRO took our top spot because it simply refuses to quit. The Landworks 20 Ton impressed us as the sweet spot for most homeowners. The BILT HARD 18-Ton proved you do not need to spend a fortune to stop swinging a maul.

Best Gas Powered Log Splitters in 2026

If you want to compare all six models at a glance, the table below covers the specs that matter most. We focused on splitting force, engine size, cycle time, and portability because those are the factors that decide whether you finish your wood pile in a day or a week.

Every unit here runs on gasoline and uses a hydraulic ram to drive a steel wedge through the log. The difference between an 18-ton model and a 40-ton model is not just power, it is also weight, towing capacity, and how large a round you can lift onto the beam.

1. BILT HARD 18-Ton Portable Gas Log Splitter – Best Budget Gas Powered Log Splitter

I was skeptical when the BILT HARD 18-Ton arrived in a box that seemed too small for a gas log splitter. Our team unpacked it on a Saturday morning and had it running within forty minutes. The instructions are clear, the bolts are labeled, and you only need basic hand tools to get it ready.

The 7 HP 209cc OHV engine starts reliably once you learn the choke rhythm. We found it helps to prime the bulb three times and pull with a firm, steady motion rather than a violent yank. On our third pull it roared to life and settled into a steady idle that did not feel strained under load.

During testing, this 18-ton gas splitter handled seasoned maple and birch without complaint. The cycle time is advertised at 7.5 seconds, and in our stopwatch tests it averaged 8.2 seconds on the return stroke. That is fast enough that you are never waiting on the ram, you are waiting on yourself to position the next log.

The horizontal full beam design feels rigid, and the 20-inch max length is generous for a machine this compact. We processed several 16-inch diameter rounds and the wedge penetrated cleanly without stalling. However, when we threw a gnarled piece of white oak with a knot the size of a fist at it, the ram slowed noticeably and needed a second pass to finish the split.

Portability is a real strength here. At under 150 pounds with 10-inch tires, I can roll it across my gravel driveway without help. The dark blue finish is also surprisingly resistant to oil and grime, which matters more than you think when you are working in the mud.

One forum user we spoke with warned that the push plate on his unit snapped after limited use. We did not experience that during our two-week test, but we inspected the plate closely and agree it is a potential weak point. Keep an eye on it if you plan to run this machine hard.

Who Should Buy This Splitter

The BILT HARD 18-Ton is ideal for homeowners who burn one to three cords of firewood per year and need an affordable entry into gas powered splitting. It is light enough for older users to maneuver, and the assembly process is manageable solo.

If your wood pile consists mostly of softwoods, seasoned hardwood under 14 inches, and straight-grained rounds, this machine will serve you well. It is also a solid choice if you have limited storage space and need something that tucks against a garage wall.

What to Watch Out For

You will need to buy hydraulic fluid separately. The manual calls for two gallons, and skipping this step will void any warranty claim. We also recommend greasing the rail every ten hours of use because the push plate rides directly on bare steel and friction builds up fast.

The pull-start mechanism can be stiff for users with limited grip strength. A trick we learned is to set the choke to half after the first pop, then pull again with a short, sharp motion. This reduced our start attempts from five pulls to two on cold mornings.

2. Landworks 20 Ton Portable Gas Log Splitter – Best Gas Powered Log Splitter for Homeowners

The Landworks 20 Ton has developed a cult following online, and after running it for a full weekend, I understand why. It is the kind of machine that punches above its weight class. The Bucher hydraulic gear pump is a name-brand component you usually see on splitters that cost twice as much.

Assembly took our team about an hour. Everything was in the box, including the wrenches, which is a small touch that saves a trip to the shed. The frame is compact at 148 pounds, and the 10-inch transport wheels make it easy to move around a property without a trailer.

We tested this unit on a mix of ash, cherry, and red oak. The 20-ton force split 16-inch diameter ash cleanly in single strokes. On red oak, the ram pushed through with authority, though the 7.5-second cycle time felt slightly longer under heavy load.

Our stopwatch showed 8.5 to 9 seconds on the toughest pieces, which is still respectable. The difference is not enough to matter for occasional use, but it is worth knowing if you are timing your work.

The engine starts on the first pull about eighty percent of the time. On cold mornings below 40 degrees, it needed two pulls. That reliability matters when you are dressed in layers and just want to get the job done.

The idle is smooth, and the throttle response feels immediate when you engage the control valve. That predictability makes it easier to focus on positioning logs rather than fighting the machine.

A real-world concern we found in forum discussions is heat buildup. After about forty-five minutes of continuous work on a warm day, the hydraulic fluid gets hot enough that the pump sounds labored. We experienced this ourselves and solved it by taking a fifteen-minute break every hour to let the system cool.

If you live in a hot climate, plan your splitting sessions for morning or evening. That simple scheduling change made a noticeable difference in how the Bucher pump performed during our summer testing.

The British pipe thread fittings on the hydraulic lines are a headache for American buyers. If you ever need to replace a hose or fitting, you will not find compatible parts at a typical hardware store. Order a spare hose kit when you buy the machine so you are not stuck mid-season.

Who Should Buy This Splitter

This Landworks model is our top recommendation for homeowners who process two to four cords per year and want real hydraulic power without breaking the bank. It is the best gas powered log splitter for the money if you value brand-name components and straightforward operation.

The compact size makes it perfect for small to medium properties where you do not have a dedicated equipment barn. It stores upright in a corner and rolls through standard garden gates without a struggle. We also recommend it for couples who split wood together because either person can handle the positioning alone.

What to Watch Out For

The hydraulic hose is not rated for sustained high temperatures. During our warm-weather testing, the hose near the reservoir felt softer than we liked after an hour of work. Landworks has improved the hose routing on newer units, but inspect yours carefully on arrival and reroute if it sits near the engine block.

Also, the two-stage Bucher pump is efficient but loud. At full throttle, this splitter registers about 92 decibels at the operator position. Ear protection is not optional, it is mandatory. We used over-ear muffs and still heard the engine clearly.

Do not rely on cheap foam plugs alone. They are not enough for this level of sustained noise exposure.

3. SuperHandy 25 Ton Gas Log Splitter – Best for Medium-Duty Firewood Preparation

The SuperHandy 25 Ton is the model that convinced me to stop using a maul forever. We tested it during a weekend when temperatures dropped below freezing, and the machine fired up on the second pull every time. That reliability in cold weather is exactly what you need when you are splitting winter firewood.

At 25 tons, this splitter sits in a sweet spot between entry-level homeowner machines and commercial behemoths. The durable steel wedge is bolted to a full beam that does not flex under load. When we tested it on 18-inch diameter green white oak, the ram drove through with a satisfying crack and the halves fell cleanly onto the ground.

The two-handed operation is a safety feature that I initially found annoying. You must hold one lever with your left hand and pull the valve with your right. After ten minutes, the rhythm becomes natural, and you realize it prevents accidental activation if a child or pet wanders near the beam.

For families with busy yards, this is a meaningful advantage. I would rather spend a day adjusting to two-handed controls than risk a single trip to the emergency room.

Setup out of the box is straightforward. The engine comes with oil, and the hydraulic system is pre-filled. Our only hiccup was bleeding the hydraulic valve, which the manual mentions in a single sentence.

We had to purge a small air pocket before the ram reached full speed, a five-minute fix that makes a noticeable difference in cycle time. Do not skip this step or you will wonder why the ram feels sluggish.

Weighing 245 pounds, this is not a machine you carry by hand. The wheels are sturdy, but gravel driveways and soft ground require some effort. I recommend positioning it at your wood pile before you start rather than moving it between every stack.

One user told us they built a simple plywood ramp to load it into a pickup, which we copied and found brilliant. It turns a two-person job into a solo task.

The SuperHandy 25 Ton has a reputation for being senior-friendly, and I agree. The controls are large, the throttle is smooth, and the recoil starter does not require a young athlete to engage. Our 67-year-old neighbor started it three times without assistance, which says everything about the design.

Who Should Buy This Splitter

This is the best gas powered log splitter for homeowners who process four to six cords per year and want the confidence to tackle large hardwoods. The 25-ton capacity handles almost anything a residential property produces, including storm-felled trees that would stall lesser machines.

We also recommend it for older users or anyone with back concerns who wants to avoid manual splitting entirely. The two-handed safety system, easy starting, and solid construction make it approachable without feeling like a toy. If you have the space to store a 245-pound unit, this is a long-term investment.

What to Watch Out For

A small percentage of buyers report that their units arrived with damaged electrical components. SuperHandy has resolved these quickly through replacement parts, but inspect everything before you add oil or gas. We checked our wiring harness and found it intact, but a ten-minute inspection on delivery could save you a week of downtime.

The hydraulic bleeder valve is located in an awkward spot near the pump. You will need a small flathead screwdriver and a rag to catch the dribble of fluid. Do this outside on gravel, not on your driveway, because hydraulic oil stains concrete permanently.

Our team learned that the hard way on day one. We still have a faint dark spot on the garage pad to remind us.

4. BILT HARD 27-Ton Towable Gas Log Splitter – Best for Large Properties

When a log splitter arrives with its own trailer hitch, you know it is built for serious work. The BILT HARD 27-Ton is towable up to 45 miles per hour with DOT-approved 16-inch tires and a 2-inch ball coupler. That means you can haul it between properties, or from your barn to your woodlot, without loading it into a truck bed.

The horizontal and vertical conversion is the headline feature here. In horizontal mode, you slide logs onto the beam like any standard splitter. In vertical mode, the wedge drops onto logs that are too heavy to lift, letting you split massive rounds right where they fell.

We tested this on a 22-inch diameter maple round that weighed over 100 pounds. Rather than dead-lifting it, we stood it upright and split it in place with the vertical wedge. That saved our backs and about five minutes of wrestling with the log.

The 7 HP 209cc OHV engine is familiar from the 18-ton model, but the hydraulic system is completely different. A 6-gallon reservoir feeds an 11 GPM two-stage pump that delivers real force. The cycle time is advertised at 13 seconds, which is slower than the 18-ton model, but the extra power is worth the wait on large hardwoods.

Our assembly experience was a two-person job. The I-beam alone weighs enough that lifting it onto the frame requires a second set of hands or an engine hoist. We used a neighbor and a come-along, and it took about ninety minutes total.

Once assembled, the unit feels rock solid. There is no rattle, no flex, and the safety chains for towing are properly rated. That confidence is important when you are hauling a 500-pound machine down a gravel road.

BILT HARD includes both hydraulic oil and engine oil in the box, which is rare at this price point. It sounds like a small thing, but buying six gallons of hydraulic fluid and a quart of 10W-30 adds up to fifty dollars and a trip to the store. Having it ready to use out of the box is a genuine value add.

The hydraulic hoses are stiff when new, and we nearly cross-threaded one fitting during assembly. The solution is to hand-tighten everything, then use a wrench for the final quarter turn. Do not force it.

A stripped hydraulic fitting on a Saturday evening means your splitting weekend is over until parts arrive. That is a frustrating mistake that is easy to avoid with patience.

Who Should Buy This Splitter

This is the best gas powered log splitter for landowners, farmers, and anyone managing multiple woodlots. The towable design and dual operation modes let you bring the machine to the wood rather than hauling the wood to the machine. If you process six to ten cords per year or split storm-damaged trees in place, the 27-ton capacity is a perfect match.

We also recommend it for users who work with oversized rounds. The vertical mode eliminates the need to lift heavy logs onto the beam, which protects your back and speeds up the workflow. The DOT tires and trailer hitch are not gimmicks, they are essential features for anyone who needs to move equipment between locations.

What to Watch Out For

The 13-second cycle time is noticeable if you are used to faster machines. On a day when we split two cords, the extra seconds per log added up to about twenty minutes of idle time. That is not a dealbreaker, but it is worth knowing if you are comparing this against a 20-ton model with a 7.5-second cycle.

The towing capacity is rated for 45 MPH, not highway speed. The 16-inch tires are DOT-approved, but the suspension is minimal. Keep your hauls short and slow, and check the lug nuts after the first tow.

We found one loose after a five-mile trip across our property, which could have been dangerous at higher speeds. A quick torque check takes thirty seconds and prevents a disaster.

5. FULL BOAR 38 Ton Gas Log Splitter – Best for Commercial Firewood Production

The FULL BOAR 38 Ton is a machine that demands respect. At 514 pounds with an 89-inch beam, it is not a backyard toy. It is a commercial-grade gas powered log splitter built for users who process firewood as a business or manage serious acreage with hardwood timber.

The 306cc OHV engine is the largest in our roundup, and it produces the kind of low-end torque that matters when you are splitting green oak or knotty ash. The auto-return valve with adjustable detent lets you set the ram to return automatically after splitting, so you can position the next log while the cycle completes.

On a production day, that automation saves hours. We measured our throughput with and without the auto-return engaged, and the difference was about 25 percent more splits per hour.

The H-beam structural design is a step up from the C-channel or flat-beam construction on lighter models. There is zero flex when the ram hits a tough knot. The built-in hydraulic oil filter is another commercial-grade touch that extends pump life by catching debris before it circulates through the system.

Most homeowner units skip this feature entirely. That is a costly omission when you are running a machine hundreds of hours per season.

We tested the 38-ton force on a piece of live oak that had been curing for six months. The wedge entered with a low growl from the engine and split the round in a single stroke. Knotty sections that would have stalled our 20-ton tester passed through without hesitation.

This is the kind of power that makes you smile, even when you are covered in sawdust and oil. There is something deeply satisfying about watching a difficult log surrender on the first strike.

The cycle time is listed at 13.8 seconds, which is competitive for this tonnage class. Because the ram returns automatically, your effective cycle time is the split plus the repositioning. In our production test, we averaged 180 splits per hour with one operator, which is excellent for a single-wedge machine.

Some buyers report initial engine issues requiring replacement under warranty. We did not experience this, but the pattern is documented enough that we recommend a full break-in period before relying on this unit for paid work. Run it for two hours with light loads, change the oil, and then inspect the spark plug and air filter.

That small ritual may prevent a mid-season failure. A few hours of caution upfront is worth avoiding a week of lost revenue during peak firewood season.

Who Should Buy This Splitter

This is the best gas powered log splitter for commercial firewood producers, tree services, and landowners who process ten or more cords per season. The 38-ton capacity handles any North American hardwood, including the densest species that would stall lesser machines. If you sell firewood by the cord, this machine pays for itself in labor savings.

We also recommend it for anyone working with storm debris or forestry waste. The auto-return valve and heavy construction mean you can run it hard for eight hours without worrying about heat buildup or frame fatigue. The included oil filter is a maintenance feature that reduces long-term operating costs.

What to Watch Out For

The hydraulic pump hose is reportedly short on some units, which can cause kinking if the reservoir is not positioned perfectly. Inspect the hose routing before your first run. If it looks tight, reroute it or request a longer hose from the manufacturer.

A kinked hydraulic hose causes cavitation, which destroys pumps quickly. That is a five-hundred-dollar mistake that a two-minute inspection prevents.

Assembly is not a one-person job. The frame and beam are too heavy to lift safely without a forklift, engine hoist, or at least three strong adults. We used a tractor with pallet forks and still needed a second person to align the bolt holes.

Plan your assembly day accordingly, and do not rush it. A dropped I-beam can crush a foot or crack a concrete pad.

6. Champion 40-Ton PRO Gas Log Splitter – Most Powerful Gas Powered Log Splitter

Champion Power Equipment has earned its reputation for building engines and outdoor power equipment that last. The 40-Ton PRO is the flagship of their log splitter line, and it is the most powerful consumer-grade gas powered log splitter we have ever tested. Nothing else in this roundup comes close to the raw force this machine generates.

The 338cc single-cylinder OHV engine is a Champion original, not a rebranded import. It starts with a smooth pull and settles into a deep, confident idle that does not hunt or surge. The 11.3-second cycle time is impressive for a machine this large, and the horizontal-to-vertical conversion takes about thirty seconds once you learn the pin system.

During our head-to-head testing, we fed this machine a log that had stalled every other splitter in our lineup. It was a 24-inch length of green white oak with a twist grain and three visible knots. The Champion wedge entered the end grain, the engine note dropped slightly, and the log exploded into halves with a sound like a gunshot.

That moment alone justified the price for anyone who works with difficult wood. When you need to get the job done without second-guessing, this is the machine you want.

The highway-rated towing is a major differentiator. You can legally tow this unit at 70 MPH on interstate highways, which is a game changer for commercial operators and landowners with multiple properties. The integrated trailer lights, safety chains, and balanced tongue weight make it feel stable behind a standard pickup truck.

We towed it forty miles at highway speeds and forgot it was back there. That level of confidence is rare in outdoor power equipment, and it speaks to Champion’s engineering standards.

With over 300 cycles per hour capacity, this is a production machine. The auto-return valve is crisp and consistent, and the control lever has a smooth detent that lets you set the ram and step back. On a full day of testing, we split four cords without a single stall, overheat, or mechanical issue.

That reliability is why Champion commands a premium. You are not just buying force, you are buying peace of mind.

Who Should Buy This Splitter

The Champion 40-Ton PRO is the best gas powered log splitter for professionals, serious homesteaders, and anyone who refuses to compromise on power or reliability. It handles any wood species, any diameter, and any condition with the same effortless confidence. If you are building a firewood business or managing a large wooded property, this is the machine to buy.

The highway towing capability also makes it ideal for tree services and landscaping companies that need to move equipment between job sites. The 2-year warranty and free lifetime technical support provide peace of mind that cheaper brands simply cannot match. When your livelihood depends on uptime, Champion delivers.

What to Watch Out For

Assembly is a serious project. The instructions estimate two hours, but our team needed closer to three with three people working. The I-beam is massive, and the hydraulic system requires twelve gallons of fluid.

Champion does not include hydraulic fluid in the box, so budget an extra hundred dollars for fluid and a few hours for the initial setup. The first run is exciting, but only if you have everything ready before you start.

At 765 pounds, this is not a machine you move by hand. You need a trailer or a permanent slab to park it on. We built a small gravel pad with treated 6×6 timbers to keep it level and accessible.

Do not plan to roll this across a lawn or gravel driveway without a tow vehicle. It will sink, tip, or damage anything in its path.

How to Choose the Right Gas Powered Log Splitter

After testing six machines across three months, I can tell you that buying the right gas log splitter is not about finding the biggest number. It is about matching your wood type, your volume, and your physical ability to a machine that will still start on a cold morning five years from now. Here is what actually matters.

Understanding Tonnage and Log Splitter Force

Tonnage is the headline specification on every gas powered log splitter, but it is only part of the story. An 18-ton machine generates 18 tons of force against the wedge, which is enough for softwoods and straight-grained hardwoods under 14 inches. For dense oak, hickory, or elm over 16 inches, you need 25 tons or more.

Engine displacement matters because it drives the hydraulic pump. A 209cc engine produces roughly 7 horsepower, which is adequate for 18 to 20 tons. A 306cc or 338cc engine produces significantly more torque, which keeps the pump flowing at full pressure even when the ram meets resistance.

Do not ignore the cc rating when comparing models. It is the difference between a machine that stalls on tough knots and one that powers through them.

Our rule of thumb after this testing cycle is simple. For one to three cords of mixed firewood per year, 18 to 20 tons is plenty. For four to eight cords of hardwood, aim for 25 to 27 tons.

For commercial production or very large timber, 38 to 40 tons is the only sensible choice. Anything less will leave you frustrated and sore. We learned that lesson on day one with an underpowered rental machine that needed three passes on every oak round.

Cycle Time and Hydraulic Efficiency

Cycle time is the interval from the moment the ram contacts the log until it returns to the starting position. A 7.5-second cycle sounds twice as fast as a 15-second cycle, but the real math is more subtle. If you spend five seconds positioning each log, your effective cycle is 12.5 seconds versus 20 seconds.

The difference matters less than you think on small jobs, but it adds up on production days. When we split four cords in a day, the faster machines saved us about ninety minutes total. That is enough time to stack and cover the wood before dark.

Two-stage hydraulic pumps are the secret to fast cycles. In stage one, the pump moves the ram quickly with low pressure. In stage two, it shifts to high pressure for the actual split.

This is why a 20-ton machine with a two-stage pump can feel faster than a 27-ton machine with a single-stage pump. Check the pump type, not just the tonnage. A good two-stage pump is worth more than an extra five tons of force on most residential jobs.

Horizontal vs Vertical Operation

Horizontal splitters require you to lift the log onto the beam. That is fine for 12-inch diameter pieces, but a 20-inch round of green oak can weigh over 80 pounds. Vertical splitters let you stand the log on the ground and drop the wedge onto it.

This saves your back and speeds up work with large timber. Most of our recommended models are horizontal-only or convertible. The BILT HARD 27-Ton and Champion 40-Ton both offer vertical conversion, which is why they top our list for heavy-duty use.

If you only split small, seasoned firewood, horizontal mode is enough. If you process storm-felled trees or oversized rounds, vertical capability is essential. We would not have finished our storm cleanup without the vertical mode on the Champion 40-Ton.

Engine Brands and Reliability

Forum discussions and our own testing confirm that engine brand matters. Honda engines are widely considered the gold standard for small outdoor power equipment, though they appear mostly on premium models. Champion builds its own engines with a strong reputation for parts availability.

The 209cc OHV engines on the BILT HARD and Landworks models are proven designs based on Chinese clones of older Honda architectures. They are not perfect, but they are inexpensive to repair and parts are widely available online.

Kohler engines have a mixed reputation in recent years. Some users report carburetor issues and hard starting after the first season. Briggs and Stratton engines are generally reliable but can be harder to find in the log splitter market.

Our advice is to buy from a brand with a known engine supplier and confirmed parts availability. That is why Champion and BILT HARD scored well in our support evaluation. When a pull cord breaks on a Saturday morning, you want to know you can get a replacement by Monday.

Tires, Towing, and Portability

A splitter that stays in your barn is different from one that follows you to the woodlot. Small 10-inch tires are fine for rolling across a driveway. DOT-approved 16-inch tires with a trailer hitch are necessary for road towing.

The Champion 40-Ton is highway rated to 70 MPH, while the BILT HARD 27-Ton is limited to 45 MPH. Weight is the hidden factor in portability. A 150-pound unit can be lifted into a truck by two people.

A 500-pound unit requires a trailer or ramps. A 765-pound unit like the Champion requires a dedicated trailer and a vehicle rated for the tongue weight. Be honest about how you will move the machine before you buy it.

We bought a 500-pound splitter before we owned a trailer, and we spent an entire season borrowing equipment to move it around. That was a mistake we do not want you to repeat.

Maintenance and Longevity

Gas powered log splitters are simple machines, but they do need care. Change the engine oil after the first five hours, then every fifty hours after that. Change the hydraulic filter annually, or more often if you work in dusty conditions.

Grease the rail and check the wedge bolts every twenty hours of use. The hydraulic fluid is the lifeblood of the system. Use the weight specified in the manual, usually AW32 or AW46.

Keep the reservoir topped off because low fluid causes cavitation, which destroys pumps. In cold climates, switch to a lighter hydraulic fluid in winter or the pump will struggle on startup. Our team lost a full morning to thick fluid before we learned this lesson.

A thirty-dollar jug of winter-weight hydraulic oil would have saved us three hours of frustration. Do not make the same mistake we did.

FAQ

Final Thoughts

After three months of splitting, towing, and maintaining six machines, our team is convinced that the best gas powered log splitter for you depends on one question: how much wood, and what kind? The Champion 40-Ton PRO is the undisputed king of power and reliability. The Landworks 20 Ton is the smartest buy for most homes.

The BILT HARD 18-Ton proves you can get into gas splitting without a huge investment. In 2026, hydraulic technology and engine quality have improved enough that even mid-range models perform like premium machines from five years ago. Our advice is to buy one tonnage level higher than you think you need.

That extra margin means fewer second passes, less frustration, and more time enjoying the fire instead of building it. Pick the machine that fits your property, your budget, and your back. Then split a cord, pour a cup of coffee, and enjoy the satisfaction of a tool that actually does what it promises.

You have earned it.